No Good Choices
You are in a pitch-black area. As your eyes adjust to the smoky air and the deafening booms you see a twinkle of light in the distance. Rubble surrounds you, and your thick boots protect your feet from the shards of glass, shrapnel and sharp, metallic objects scattered all across the earth. Yesterday a close friend died, and three of the hostages in Gaza are friends making this war – which you did not ask for – deeply personal. You are tired, having walked for days and you have not eaten a good meal in weeks. The fact that you have been unable to communicate with your family for weeks and weeks is too much to handle, particularly given the fact that their city continues to get bombarded by missiles from Gaza. All of a sudden, there is a shout in the distance, but it is hard to make it out. Your foot touches something in the ground. It is shaped a little larger than a pinecone but hard to the touch. You pull out your flashlight without removing your foot as you understand what this could be. Looking more closely you understand this is a grenade with the pin already pulled. It is not exploding because the dirt is packed solid around it, just like the grenades that were left at the Nova Music Festival in southern Israel on October 7th. As first responders came to witness the horrors of the rape, murder and devastation wrought upon the young crowd that came to dance, they also were faced with live grenades packed into the ground much tighter than sardines. Hamas’ goal was to maximize the casualties, and you know from experience you never move a body or an object without first checking for a grenade, an explosive device or some other type of booby trap. With your foot still on the grenade, you call for a bomb squad. Perspiration starts to drip down your back from the stress and the fear not to mention the 50 lbs of gear you are carrying. After a few minutes – which seems like hours – the bomb squad comes and ever so gently manages to find a way to insert a pin back into the grenade with all of your limbs still intact. Your unit proceeds as you search, high and low, building by building, room after room desperately trying to find any one of the 133 hostages still inside Gaza. Your heart aches for the remaining women that have been physically and emotionally beaten by Hamas. You know the “civilians” cheered on Hamas as they paraded Jewish hostages through the streets on October 7th. Despite this, you don’t wish to hurt anyone even though so many of the Gazans want to see you dead. Your only objective is to find the hostages and bring them home to their families. From the corner of your eye a flag goes up. It is white but hard to make it out in the darkness. You hear someone yell in perfect Hebrew, “Save us. We are hostages.” The IDF has warned you against such scenarios as you know they can be a trick, but your heart is telling you this is the moment every soldier has waited for. It is why you have agreed to do this. The one thing your family and your neighbors said is, “Bring home one hostage. It will be as if you saved the world.”
The Talmud teaches us so. As it is written (Sanhedrin 37a): “Whoever saves a single life is considered by scripture to have saved the whole world.” Nevertheless, your training kicks in and you proceed cautiously or at least as cautiously as one can when a split-second decision can mean the difference between life and death. You know the entire unit is counting on you as the decision you make next is the difference between life and death. There have been reports of hostages in the area, but you have also heard some of the soldiers sharing reports of children as young as seven years old pretending to need help sent towards soldiers to distract them only to have Hamas attack them from behind. Sure enough, the voices you are hearing are those of a young child. It would seem he is running towards you waving a white flag. You place your gun down. You can no longer feel your arm which is clearly numb as you have been holding the gun at a 90-degree angle for more than an hour. There is a gnawing feeling at the back of your head. While the child is speaking Hebrew his accent does not sound right, and light from a nearby building reflects on his new sneakers. Would a hostage taken a couple of months ago be wearing new sneakers? The child takes his arm and throws something at you while the rapid fire from a machine gun begins to echo. You fall to the ground, not injured but understanding you are under attack and before you can determine where the bullets are coming from, the child disappears down a chute – into the ground. It’s hard to determine exactly where the chute is as a sniper fires upon you from the roof of a nearby building. Your focus is on getting to safety and protecting your unit. You dive behind a pile of sand and rubble as you hear someone scream in the distance. You manage to get into shooting position despite pain ripping through your thigh. Another man appears from a building. You’re injured and cannot take any more chances. You shoot and pray to the One Above, He the giver and taker of life.
Your memory reflects back on the moment you received your gun. “I want to give you a blessing,” said the man. “May you never have to use it. Ever.” Words escaped you, but you answered with an affirmative, “Amen.” Your partner in the unit opens fire as well thinking you must know something he does not. The target has been hit. You have saved lives…..or have you? The shots have pierced the night and fresh blood soaks the sand. “No,” you hear the Commander yell. “You have shot a hostage. You have made a terrible mistake.”
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What if it were you? The above scenario is – perhaps – not true or maybe it is true. One thing I have learned is you have not walked in someone’s shoes until you have, well, walked in someone’s shoes. These young men and women that were called upon to defend the Holy Land were given an impossible job. The decisions they have to make are based upon life and death, and I will never forgive Hamas for putting them in a situation where they were forced to see and experience things no person should be forced to see. What I have written above is based upon my many discussions with men and women in uniform and civilians that have been in Gaza and put in the most horrific circumstances and then after all of it….they are judged by the world.
Yes, there are things I have heard and seen that I cannot write about. Perhaps one day. For now, the above scenario is a very real horror story that these young people are forced to live over and over again.
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David
David at People for Israel
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Since October 7, 2023
